4Am Forever
by xoxJoJoRulesBabyxox
Summary: What Do You Do When Your Best Friend Is Gone? Summer Finds Out, What Happens When She Goes Missing? Please Read & Review First Fan Fic [SS & RM]


**Disclaimer:** Unfortunatly I Only Own The Oc In My Dreams

This is my firstfanfic and its a song fic to Lostprophets Song - 4 Am Forever

Please R&R It will make me wanna continue to write

_**JoJo**_

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_**Yesterday I lost my closest friend**_

One whole day she had been gone.

I spent the whole of that day wishing for her back

My best friend was gone

And nothing that Seth, Her Dad, Kirsten or Sandy said could change it.

There attempts were useless!

_  
**Yesterday I wanted time to end**_

The news cut through me like a knife.

I just wanted the day to rewind and for her not go in the truck

I want to tell Ryan to stop when Volchuck said

Maybe she would still be alive

That's why I ran, it had to stop

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**I wonder if my heart will ever mend**_

Pain.

That's all I Feel

No love, No Hate

Just Pain

I feel the pain of my two best friends, For Julie and Katlin

It made it 10 Times Worse to be here

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**I just let you slip away**_

I wish i had said a better goodbye to you.

Ryan tried to stop you from dying

But you still let go and left us here!

As I stand here tonight I know they are looking for me but I don't want to be found.

**4 AM forever**

**Maybe I'll never see you smile again**

I turned my mobile off

Apart from the numerous calls of people worried about me, voicemails asking where I was

The picture of you and me broke my heart

The warmest smile of all, the one that could take Cohen off my mind

I'd never see it again, and I'm scared of that thought

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**Maybe you thought that it was all pretend;**_

Denial

One of the five stages of grieve they say

I don't need a shrink to tell me I'm in denial

A part of me died the night you did

When I think about life without you I still see you

Realizing it was a dream

Denial!

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**All these words that I could never say**_

All the late night hone calls

The times we had bitching sessions about Ryan and Cohen

Seemed so far away but yet still fresh as the day at the model home

The times I said that I loved you

I want to be able to tell you them just one more time

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**I just let them slip away**_

I've taken al the time that we spent together for granted

The time we fell out over the person that caused your death

The time when we both held each other and cried after Ryan and Seth left

There are only 3 of us now and to me, that just isn't right

You should be on a plane and Ryan should be playing stupid video games with Seth

Instead he's just come out of hospital and your dead

**4 AM forever**

**Why don't you hear me when I'm calling out to you (to you)**

I scream your name

Cry a river of tears

But God won't give you back to me

I hear them call out my name

_  
**Why don't you listen when I try to make it through (to you)**_

This is my way of dealing

They don't realize i'm looking down on them like you are to me

The only difference is that i'm on cliffs and you're in heaven

You're at peace and i'm in pain

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**Goodbye, goodbye**_

Goodbye

I said goodbye to you a few hours ago

But the only thing is

I said goodbye for 6 months

Not a lifetime

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**Goodbye, you never know**_

And that what hurt the most

Knowing I can't phone you and ask you simple things

To moan about Cohen or talk about the Valley

You're gone and you're never coming back

_**Hold a little tighter**_

If only you could have survived till you got to the hospital

Maybe not in a body bag

I hold onto the edge of the cliff and look at the time

4 AM

They phone again

"Just Let Us Know Your Safe Don't Do Anything Stupid, I Can't Lose You To"_  
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**4 AM forever** _

Maybe one day when I can move along

Brown

Me going to college is out of the window now

I want to but I can't leave Seth or Ryan now

Maybe one day, f I survive this I will go

They on the beach I can hear them calling for me

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**Maybe someday when you can hear this song**_

If I didn't go back with them

Stay here look a the stars and know you're the brightest one of all

Then maybe it will be like when your were alive

But I would be alone, Your be a sprit

What if I was one too?

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**You won't let it slip away**_

I Couldn't allow that to happen

Mentally Kick myself for thinking that

I know that's what's you would do

They came by the cliffs

Calling My name, please let it just be you and me

_**4 AM forever** _

**And I'd wish the sun would never come**

It's getting lighter

They will see me, talk me down I no they will

But no matter what you're still gone and I can't handle it

My phone rings again

They don't realize I can see them

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**It's 4 AM and you are gone**_

I know if you weren't dead you would be down there to

Would I even be up here after what happened to Johnny, he fell from here

Hope is looking after you up there

I just wish I could make the pain stop

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**I hope you know you're letting go**_

Why didn't you fight

Leave me all alone

That's why I'm like this

IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE GONE

You let the light take you

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**It's 4 AM and I'm alone** _

**Why don't you hear me when I'm calling out to you (to you)**

I Scream as the tears come, Chuck my phone of the cliff to stop it ringing

They look at it

They realize I'm up here

They Call out to Me

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**Why don't you listen when I try to make it through (to you)**_

I Stand up and try to steady myself

"Oh My God" It's a faint whisper I hear

I see Ryan start to climb up here

"Summer come down please I Love You" How come I can listen to Seth when you cant here me try to get through to you.

Goodbye, goodbye

Why did you leave me

Look how vulnerable I am now just because of this

Look at the rivers of tears I have cried

Look at everybody's faces

Why did you go

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**Goodbye, you never know**_

You can never have the life you deserve

Have all the happiness that you deserve

You graduated didn't you?

You thought that would never happen

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**Hold a little tighter**_

My footing slips and rocks fall to the ground beneath I stay in place

I try to hold on a little tighter

Just like you should of

Maybe, Just maybe you were tired of fighting

If only you would have thought one last time

_**Why don't you hear me when I'm calling out to you (to you)**_

"Summer" I Turn around to see Ryan hurt and scared he might lose somebody else

"Grab my hand Summer Please Marissa Wouldn't Want This" That's the first time he's said your name or referenced you in anyway

This is what happens when you lose somebody

We try all the means to get them back but each try is more desperate

_**Why don't you listen when I try to make it through (to you)**_

"I Can't Live Without Her Ryan" I Didn't want to speak but I turned to the stars and he brightest one is gone, there all dull now

More rocks crumble from the edge

"Summer Please, We Will Get Through This!" He's Desperate I look at his outreached hand

He's Trying to get through to me, your beside me holding my hand Marissa I can feel you.

_**Goodbye, goodbye**_

I Take his hand and he pulls me away from the edge

He hugs me, for once I want his hug because he reminds me of you

Ryan's phone goes its Seth

"She's Fine" I'm Far from it but he means physically

_**Goodbye, you never know**_

The brightest star is back again

It's smiling that m okay, I know its you

For that I am grateful that you saved my life

_**Hold a little tighter**_

He takes me back down to the beach

Where Cohen stands

Kirsten and Sandy drive me home

Theres a place I can go to feel you looking down on us

It's Wherever the brightest star is

_**4 AM forever...**_

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